Facing a Terminal Fetal Diagnosis

You have learned the heartbreaking news that your baby is not expected to survive.  You likely feel numb and have trouble believing that your child will not go on to live a healthy life.  You may also feel quite pressured to make a decision regarding the outcome of your pregnancy.  Many parents are not aware that their child has a terminal diagnosis until mid-way through the pregnancy.  At this point, parents are presented with the option of termination.  Depending on where you live, you may feel rushed to make a decision about the outcome of your pregnancy due to your state's limitations on pregnancy termination.  Parents facing this agonizing choice need to be given time to consider their options in an unhurried way.  

Terminating a Pregnancy for Medical Reasons

The majority of parents facing a serious fetal anomaly decide to end the pregnancy.  Although it's a common decision, it's uncommon to find people sharing openly that termination was part of their reproductive journey.  Parents who have ended a wanted pregnancy may feel even more alone than parents who have had a miscarriage or stillbirth.  Many of the infant loss resources out there aren't inclusive of parents who make the choice to terminate their pregnancy.  It's especially important that you find some good support for yourself during this difficult time.  To find online resources, try searching under the term "TFMR" (termination for medical reasons.)  Check out our list of resources for parents who have terminated for a medical reason. ​

Carrying the Pregnancy to Term

You may decide that it's best for you to carry your pregnancy to term.  The resources below can help you navigating that journey.  Check out the website www.carryingtoterm.org for more information.

​Perinatal Hospice Services

​Perinatal hospice services support parents during pregnancies when it is known that the baby is not expected to survive.  They help parents plan for the birth, help parents cope with their grief, plan how to spend time with the baby after birth and help make funeral plans.  You can find local resources at www.perinatalhospice.org.  ​

Infant Loss Doula Services

You may have heard of hiring a doula for pregnancy or postpartum, but you can also hire a doula trained in bereavement care to help you through an upcoming loss.  Search online for local resources.